Thursday, August 23, 2012

Baby, write this down!

2 Corinthians 10:5  Casting down our imaginations and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of God.

OMG, here I go again!  Just when I thought I was over him or at least making great strides in that direction thoughts of him come creeping back. When a relationship ends that we were heavily invested in, our first response is anger and a sense of freedom.  But as time goes by and the reality starts to sink in, it's natural to remember only the good times.  The good qualities and the things we 'loved' about our lost love seem to become magnified with each passing day. We drive by 'our favorite restaurant or night spot'. 'Our' favorite program comes on the tube, and of course the proverbial 'our song' comes flowing across the airwaves when we're driving either to or from work.  And suddenly, all the reasons we had to hate this person with every fiber of our being seems to have vanished...disappeared.  So, what's a girl to do?  You know in your head and you're still working on urging that 'all knowing' to travel south down to our heart - that this is not the man for you. There is no way he is God's best for you. Even if he were to come back on bended knee, the chances of the same thing happening again at some point down the road are inevitable. You know that he doesn't love you the way you deserve to be loved and he doesn't value you. Okay girlfriend, this is when you grab a pen and paper and make a list.  Write down all those reasons you left him or if he was the one to leave...write down the way he ended everything.  Did he talk to you like an adult? Did he try to explain where he's coming from?  Or was he heartless? Ending things with a screaming match or worse yet...an email or text. Did you catch him in a lie - or worse cheating?  Has he devalued you as a human being?  Was he critical of you - the way you dress, or talk, or maybe of your family, your car, your apartment or home?  Write each and every incident where and when he made you feel 'less than' down.  Write down the broken promises.  Write down if he pushed you, slapped you or grabbed you so hard it left a bruise.  Write it ALL down.  And then, when you start down that slippery romantic slope for the umpteenth time... pull out your 'list' and read and re-read it, until the reasons you left him or the relationship ended are once again crystal clear.Rome wasn't built in a day - so go easy on yourself. Get out there and excercise, or take a class, work until you're so tired, you just collapse in bed, get a massage or a pedicure, get together with friends and plan things in advance for the weekend.  Movies are a great escape - at least for me - I enjoy escaping for 2 hours with a cold drink and bag of popcorn or M&M's.  You can do this.  Just take it one day at a time...and keep 'the list' handy.  You never can tell when you might need to remind yourself WHY! 

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